If you’ve ever seen me in person you know I wear a white bracelet around my right wrist.  You can certainly see it in almost every picture of me within the last year.  The bracelet reads, “sTAY strong”.  I often get asked what this means and I haven’t yet gotten good at a concise answer.  It’s a challenge for me to quickly say how it connects to me – it’s even more of a challenge to tell people how deep that emotional connection is.  I figured I’d write my answer here and see where it goes…

Taylor Rivera, a beautifully charming teenager faced a very rare childhood cancer and found herself in and out of treatment for several years.  She had a very close friendship with my friend Kennedy.  Amanda Peebles, the cancer girl I got the closest to (as you can read here) also looked up to Taylor.  It was a close group of kids fighting cancer.

When Taylor passed, at her funeral I was given a bracelet by one of her family members.  I was able to attend the funeral with Amanda (one of the last events I got to spend with her outside the hospital).  Taylor’s theme was sTAY strong.  TAY is for Taylor.  It’s a phrase that to this day keeps the community going when it gets tough.  We have a hard time imagining the strength it must take to endure the long-term battle of childhood cancer – certainly even worse when you consider the daily symptoms.  The strength the kids pull from is beyond anything I’ve ever seen or exemplified in my life.  It’s almost impossible for me to imagine the strength.

I wear this because every time I look at it, it reminds me of these two girls, Amanda & Taylor.  Together they fought and they passed within months of each other.  I vowed to always wear it to remind me to keep fighting the same way these girls did – to do all I can to make their sacrifice help other kids who are fighting.  It’s what reminds me of my duty in this lifetime to make their memory one that saves others.

Now you can imagine how hard this is to explain quickly, right? I have a humble sacredness to Amanda’s and Taylor’s story, and their memory is inspiring to me every single day.

So, in honor of Taylor and Amanda, wake-up every day and sTAY strong.

After an exciting holiday and before I left Denver I received a phone call from Donavan inviting me to a Denver Nuggets game in the Make-A-Wish suite. Donavan (on the left in the photo above) is my good friend who has battled childhood cancer for the past several years and is now doing exceptionally well. I met Donavan through Amanda Peebles as they were boyfriend and girlfriend when Amanda was going through the worst time of her treatment. Donavan has inspired me and has become one of my closest friends. The smile in his eyes is one that you will always remember and appreciate. He is looking great and starting to feel better. This past year was his first year back in school. I am so proud of him and his family for their ability to thrive through this crisis.

A special thank you to Make-A-Wish Colorado who provides this kind of entertainment often for kids and their families, they truly are an incredible organization.

I consider myself so lucky to know these heroes. I can’t help but share with you all. Below are a few pictures from the game – Donavan, thanks man. Can’t thank you enough for the friendship and the time.

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This post talks about Amanda Peebles – for those of you who don’t know about her, you can read more here.

On Sunday it will have been 1 year since you left us. Miss you more than ever.

Love you mandabear.

A non-profit organization in Denver, Colorado recently filmed an up-close and personal vignette on my good friend Donavan. I met Donavan about a year ago and have met few that are as caring and kind as he is. He was Amanda Peebles boyfriend. It is so nice to see such a well put together video of him and his family sharing their story. It’s important to note Donavan’s unique ear to ear smile – it’s certainly what I see every time I am around him. He is a very cool dude!

The art of collaboration is humbling. When thousands or even millions of people unite to achieve the same outcome it is a tricky combination of luck, strategy, and sacrifice. I spend a lot of effort working with the childhood cancer cause. However, you may notice that there is no leader in Childhood Cancer awareness or support. When asked to list the number one organization in this cause you might be quick to say, “St Jude’s Children’s Research Hospital” or “American Cancer Society”. These are both fine organizations but they are not major players in pediatric cancer when you boil down the numbers.

The cause of curing Childhood Cancer is not ubiquitous in our culture. Many people know that kids get cancer. They do not know how much funding fails to go towards curing it. More money has been spent to solve poverty, homelessness, and environmentalism in the past month than there has been towards childhood cancer in the past decades.

Let’s discuss for a second the culture inside the cause – the hundreds of organizations that are 501c3 non-profits working to help patients and families with Childhood Cancer. I will only talk about my personal experience because that is all I can speak accurately about. The cause is competitive, it’s distilled, and it’s got a million different directions. Unlike Breast Cancer, Autism, Aids, and other causes, Childhood Cancer has not managed to unite in branding – it is not backed by one message and a united group of non-profits working towards the same cause.

I write this blog entry to let you all know of the realities of this community – I do what I can to unite these organizations but even I don’t have access to most of the people in this cause yet. I can only hope that the masses can come together and make this happen. It’s important to realize the reality of this cause and face the facts. What’s even more challenging is trying to explain this to a child and parent when they ask why so many people aren’t aware or aligned with the mission of curing and helping their child.

Emotions are a tricky thing. We tend to focus on the most painful emotions because they are typically much more powerful. The sadness I feel when I think of Amanda Peebles who lost her battle to cancer in August of 2010 is sometimes overwhelming. You miss them terribly. You think of their life and celebrate all they achieved and the depth of impact they had on others lives. However, it’s sometimes easy to overlook those kiddos who have survived.

When I first started volunteering at the Children’s Hospital in Denver, Colorado I had no idea what children with cancer even went through. On the first Saturday I was on my own, I met my first childhood cancer patient (LEFT – Kennedy). She was bald, she was sick, but she was incredible. Talk about a hero – this girl smiled every time I saw her and that never changed. She fought for over a year and a half with Osteosarcoma (Bone Cancer). I left and moved to San Diego but my relationship with her would stay strong and she is now one of the healthiest and most beautiful girls today. She is in 8th grade and continues to amaze all of us with her abilities and spirit. This year, she won the Colorado Girls State Volleyball Championship with her team. I was lucky enough to watch her journey from when she was in the hospital to being a normal teenage girl.

The emotions are reversed. I am thrilled… Tears of sadness turn to tears of happiness and I just watch as her life blossoms around her. She is so strong, so happy, and so humble. You sit and wonder how these perfect kids get cancer. Why? My place is not to question why for that is a trap in which I will not find answers. I just sit back and enjoy knowing these amazing kids. Every time I am fortunate enough to see Kennedy, I can’t even explain the joy and admiration. To visit Kennedy’s site go to: www.caringbridge.org/visit/kennedy1

I’ve learned that it’s a delicate balancing act. To love someone so much and watch them fight for years and loose, and to see others fight for years and get their life back. The sadness, and the joy…they all combine into a realm of conflicting emotions. However, the one thing that never changes is the love you have for them, and the astonishing strength to which they approach all of life.

A few weeks ago I was fortunate enough to accompany Donavan (a Childhood Cancer patient in Denver, Colorado) to the Alice 105.9’s 36 Hours for Kids. This is a local radio station fundraiser that lasts for 36 hours (3 days) and they devote most all of the air time to The Denver Children’s Hospital. For the cancer kiddo’s I know in Denver this is a big annual event for them.

I was able to walk around with Donavan and talk to him and also arranged a meeting with Slacker and Steve (Alice 105.9’s famous afternoon DJ’s that Donavan loves). He also met the lead singer of The Fray. Many of you may also remember that Donavan was Amanda Peebles boyfriend and I became close to him after Amanda’s passing. This is an amazing teenager! He is so supportive of his family and friends. I haven’t written much about him but I plan to do much more. His health is still doing very good.

I included a video below of the 36 Hours for Kids to give you an idea of what this is about. Thanks Donavan for a great time!

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